For married people, one of the safeguards against pornography is to have a healthy sexual relationship with your spouse. Sadly though, more and more I realize that most couples are not “on the same page” sexually.
Someone said “Before marriage Satan will try to do everything to get couples in the sack, and after marriage, everything to keep them out of the sack.” My experience in counseling couples verifies the accuracy of this quote. Lots of couples hop in the sack before marriage, and then struggle with sexual intimacy after marriage. Satisfying sex is the result of intimacy in body, soul, and spirit; an experience that few married couples seem to be enjoying in fullness.
Here are a few things married couples can do to begin to improve their sexual experience:
- Talk about your sex life regularly. I learned how to please Ruthie because she taught me about her sexual needs. I taught her about mine.
- Get help from a trusted counselor or spiritual leader. Nobody can figure out life on their own. We all need help from others.
- Change your view of sex: it’s not a chore, a duty, a right, a dirty practice, or an obligation. In our sexual intimacy seminar Ruthie and I call sex worship. It is a time to celebrate our love for each other that was given to us by God. Our spirit, soul, and body intimacy is a fruit of our intimacy with God.
If you are married and not valuing your sex life, today is a good day to start a new journey to sexual fulfillment for both you and your spouse!