Small Group Discussion Guide For Beyond Sexual Purity Video Series

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Small Group Discussion Guide For Beyond Sexual Purity Video Serie

 

 

Light Bulbs and Inner Transformation

When I teach a class or seminar, I ask each participant to look for the light bulbs that click on in their mind. A light bulb is a nugget of truth that comes to your mind with understanding. It is an “ah-ha” moment of revelation-knowledge from the Holy Spirit. Light-bulb moments come from something you learn directly from the teaching or from something that comes indirectly from the Holy Spirit. Light bulb moments are those times that truth infiltrates your mind as light that dispels darkness. These are the life-transforming moments. It is what Jesus spoke of when He said, “You shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free” (John 8:32).

At the beginning of each section in this discussion guide I ask: “What light bulbs clicked on in your mind during this session?” What truths rose to the surface with understanding and grace?

 

Personal or Group

This guide is designed for small group discussion, but can be used in larger groups, or for you to work through if you are taking this course by yourself. Do take the time, though, whatever environment you are in, to reflect on what you learn through each section.

Your options are (depending on the size of your group), whole-group processing and/or prayer, or small-group. Consider the atmosphere of the teaching and decide which seems more beneficial. It may be good, but not necessary to keep the small groups with consistent participants because of the nature of the topic. Make sure everyone agrees to “what is talked about here, stays here!”

 

Other Teachings

On my YouTube channel (which you can find under my name) or at my website, BruceLengeman.com there are other audio, written, or video teachings for men on the subject of purity that are not included in this video series. You may want to check them out.

 

How to Use This Workbook

In your group you will may not time to discuss and pray over all the questions, but pick the one or ones that are most relevant to you in the moment. If something else comes up from the first question about lightbulbs clicking on, don’t think you have to answer the questions. Follow the Holy Spirit, and He will guide you, and minister to you.

 

Session One: Framing Our Mind for the Journey

 

What light bulbs clicked on in your mind—what truths stuck out to you in this session?

 

 

Try to explain what you understand about the difference between behavior modification (or surface management) and conquering sexual lust at the root.

 

 

How did learning that sexual dependency is a process addiction substance which is quite different than a substance addiction, help you in understanding your journey toward sexual purity?

 

 

NOTES:

 

 

 

 

Session Two: What I Learned in My Journey

 

 

What light bulbs clicked on in your mind—what truths stuck out to you in this session?

 

 

How does the lion in the cage affect you?

 

 

Explain the difference between not free to and free not to. How does this apply to you?

 

 

Why do you think the following two points are necessary for all men to understand in order to have victory over lust?

*   My sexuality is a friend, not an enemy. God made me sexual, even though He desires me to be pure.

*   My sexuality is for more than sex. It undergirds by creativity, passions, and many other dynamics in my life.

 

 

NOTES:

 

 

 

 

Session Three: Agreements and the Power of Repentance

 

What light bulbs clicked on in your mind—what truths stuck out to you in this session?

 

 

What does the bucket with holes mean to you in relationship to pornography?

 

 

Where do you need to Break & Make: shame, rejection, failure, feeling inadequate or underneath others, fears, bitterness, disappointment with God, disappointment with self, father wound, mother wound, people pleasing, other issues?

 

 

How will you apply the truth of metanoia, changing your mind, in your spiritual journey?

 

 

NOTES:

 

 

 

 

Session Four: The Stage and the Wound

 

What light bulbs clicked on in your mind—what truths stuck out to you in this session?

 

 

Everyone in the world at some point finds some kind of stage to get acceptance and to self-protect. On that stage you become an actor—either to comply or control, not realizing that the actor is not the real you. God desires that you get off the stage so that He can love and relate to the real you, because He doesn’t want to commune with the actor part of you. In light of this, what events in your life, or words spoken to you or about you, caused you to get on a stage, and in what areas do you need to get off of the stage and become the real you?

 

 

How does people-pleasing relate to the stage life?

 

 

NOTES:

 

 

 

 

Session Five: Who Defined You?

 

What light bulbs clicked on in your mind—what truths stuck out to you in this session?

 

 

What spoken words or circumstances caused you to define yourself in a false way?

 

 

Could you relate to Don Sauder’s testimony? If so, how?

 

 

What are your thoughts about Derrell’s testimony at the end of the teaching. He said that His “process” was more valuable than being “zapped” into victory—like Naaman desired?

 

 

NOTES:

 

 

 

 

Session Six: Identity

 

What light bulbs clicked on in your mind—what truths stuck out to you in this session?

 

 

Discuss the statement: “You will never go higher than what you believe about yourself.” Why is this so?

 

 

At what level would you have put yourself on the social status ladder? Are you free to renounce this ladder in your life?

 

 

To what degree do you think rejection has influenced your life?

 

 

NOTES:

 

 

 

 

Session Seven: Identity and Passivity

 

What light bulbs clicked on in your mind—what truths stuck out to you in this session?

 

 

Could you recognize any “tattoos” that God would have you to change? For example: Failed too many times, don’t feel important, not good enough, on the outside looking in with God.

 

 

How can you and I help others out or passivity?

 

 

Read the list of characteristics of a passive man in To Kill a Lion, pages 78-79. Can you recognize areas where you are passive? Can you renounce them now and ask God to change you?

 

 

Do you ever listen to the counterfeit voice of God that speaks to you like a master to a slave, with legalism, condemnation, accusation, and devaluing? Explain.

 

 

NOTES:

 

 

 

 

Session Eight: Shame

 

What light bulbs clicked on in your mind—what truths stuck out to you in this session?

 

 

What areas of shame do you need to accept forgiveness for and lay at the cross?

 

 

Did the teaching on God forgiving 70X70 help you? If so, how?

 

 

Why do we often feel as if trading our sins for the righteousness of Christ is unfair to Jesus? How can you get over this and accept his free gift of forgiveness and a new start?

 

 

Do you ever feel as if Jesus has a limit on how much He will forgive you?

 

 

NOTES:

 

 

 

 

Session Nine: Rebellion and the Independent Spirit

 

What light bulbs clicked on in your mind—what truths stuck out to you in this session?

 

 

Are there places or areas in your life that are still under your control and not God’s? Are you willing to pray and give those places to God?

 

 

Discuss this statement: The main place Christ is formed in us are those places we trust in Him even though we don’t understand, don’t like the price, or feel as if He is not doing His part.

 

 

An independent heart may say, “I’ll be a good Christian but not a great one.” How would you explain to a believing friend that this mindset is not acceptable? How does dying to self relate to this? Can you think of verses that would apply to this?

 

What “independent spirit” attitude would allow a person to give into sexual temptation?

 

 

NOTES:

 

 

 

 

Session Ten: Ruthie’s and My Challenge to Men

 

What light bulbs clicked on in your mind—what truths stuck out to you in this session?

 

 

Explain what you learned about a woman’s need for exclusivity.

 

 

Why does pornography make a wife feel as if she is not enough?

 

 

How does pornography and the sex industry abuse women? Do you want anything to do with this?

 

 

NOTES:

 

 

 

 

Session Eleven: Steve Stutzman and Sex as God Created It

 

What light bulbs clicked on in your mind—what truths stuck out to you in this session?

 

 

Could you relate to any part of Steve’s testimony about his mother-wound?

 

 

Explain why sexual enjoyment must be a blend of body, soul and spirit. How does pornography become a bucket with holes in relation to this thought?

 

 

What are you going to put into practice in your life as a result of this teaching?

 

 

NOTES:

 

 

 

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